Today, we’re exploring the essential dos and don’ts of casting love spells.

When we’re seeking answers to emotional or spiritual questions, our immediate physical surroundings aren’t necessarily all that helpful. Focusing on our present conditions helps us navigate our day-to-day, but to get in touch with the occult and look into the future, we have to dig a little deeper.

As a professional spiritual healer and traditional healing practitioner, I work with clients to help them tap into alternate planes of existence. Traditional practices such as spell-casting are founded on the belief that the physical realm is merely a by-product of unseen energetic forces, including our consciousness, thoughts, will, and emotions. What’s more, while most thoughts become absorbed by our greater consciousness, others can become self-sustaining vibrations. (Some occultists believe that these powerful thoughts are what we often refer to as “ghosts”: Battlefields and old houses, for example — two sites commonly thought of as “haunted” — may be infused with energetic forces from the past that reverberates into the present.)

When we elevate a thought by infusing it with our magickal intention, it transforms into energy. Spell-casting is the art of identifying, raising, and directing energy to actualize our intentions, and when it comes to matters of the heart, love spells are the perfect tool for inviting positivity and connection into our lives. (You may think of love spells as magick that compels a certain individual to harbor romantic feelings for you, but love spells shouldn’t be about commandeering someone else’s will — more on that in a bit.)

While some love spells are extremely complicated, calling for obscure ingredients and implementation at specific times, others are extremely straightforward. For instance, you can conduct a love spell by charging a candle with magickal intention: Simply communicate your will to it through words, dance, song, or even telepathically, then light the wick. When the candle has burned completely, your love spell has been cast. There are online resources and books that can help you identify which spells speak to your specific situation, as well as to your soul. But before you begin, it’s important to remember that there are some rules to follow. Here are some of the most important dos and don’ts of casting love spells.

Your magickal intention is the foundation of any spell. Simply put, if you don’t believe your spell will work, it won’t. In order to make any change — not just within spell-casting, but in life at large — it is crucial to believe in your will. Every day, people change the world with their ideas. Your thoughts are always powerful forms of energy: Positive thoughts amplify abundance, while negative thoughts amplify scarcity. If you cast a spell you don’t believe you can manifest, you’re wasting your time.

Yes, you can both believe in your spell-casting practice and manage your expectations of what it will yield. Unfortunately, love spells will neither transform a frog into a prince nor make your favorite celebrity crush fall in love with you. If you’re focusing your spell on a specific individual, you need to already have a strong connection with that person, and you shouldn’t attempt to transform who they are or how they feel; instead, focus on inviting more abundance and love into your relationship with them.

Keep in mind that a person unavailable in one realm is unavailable in all realms. For instance, if your lover is extremely blocked in the spiritual realm, love spells can do little to help you deepen your relationship with her in the physical realm; she must be emotionally and spiritually open to spellwork first. Alternatively, if the object of your affection is currently in a relationship with someone else in the physical realm, he’s not someone you can connect with in the spiritual realm. (Besides, you don’t want to set an intention of ending someone’s else happy relationship, do you?)

Lost Love Spells are based on patterns of connection, the notion that a part can represent a whole and that we can connect our individual practices with the wider workings of the universe. This is the premise of all divination practices, as captured by the classic Hermetic axiom, “As above, so below”.

To find the most direct route to manifesting your intention, spend some time figuring out which correspondences best suit your needs. If you are drawn to moon cycles, explore the offerings of each lunation: New moons, for instance, are a great time to begin something new, whereas full moons are useful for discovering truths. Days of the week, colors, textures, herbs, leaves, and crystals are all time-honored correspondence devices, as their unique properties can amplify the power of your love spells. You’re also free to create your own associations — just remember, specificity is everything.

Unlike your exes, the universe doesn’t play games: It gets right to the point, and so when you’re casting a love spell, your intentions need to be extremely specific. Remember, love spells are simply conduits for energy, and if your spell is based on generalizations, your results will be imprecise. If you’re involving your partner in your love spell, you can focus on that person by creating an incantation that incorporates their name, for example. Alternatively, you can create attraction love spells to welcome new love or release romantic blockages, and although these concepts are broader, you can still get specific about the intentions within them: Are you looking for long-term commitment or passionate sex? Are you seeking to let go of painful, lingering feelings for your ex? Make sure you know precisely what you want to achieve before beginning your spell.

When you cast your love spell, you’ll be channeling a great amount of energy, so don’t be surprised if you physically feel the vibrations you’re projecting. Your senses will also be heightened and you’ll be more receptive to subtle shifts within your environment, including in movements, temperatures, and sounds.